Contributing Authors

Muslims won't leave any efforts untried to defend Islam. Here's another, probably never heard by anyone. An Indian young woman claims to have talked to a host of Allah's angels, who gave her tips on how to defend Islam and Muhammad on forums like ours. I give her a fair chance to convince some of you, to the detriment of our mission.

Recently I recieved an email from one Shireen Akhtar. She wrote:

I have a true story to tell, but I guess you may not be interested in it since you publish only anti-Islam stuff. If you were ready to publish, I would tell you my own journey from Islam to atheism to Islam. Is there any harm in listening to someone's opinion which is based on different set of experiences or are you just too frightened that you will lose your followers?

I wrote back to her, saying that I would publish her story, if it was interesting, despite the fact that the "followers of her beloved religion come out, with arms in hands, to seek out people like us" for our annihilation, let alone publish our story. Below is her story, with my comments [in green] included at appropriate places.

Dear Mr Khan,
Against my expectations, you answered my mail. Thank you for that. I am indeed, both, surprised and grateful that you have invited my story. I would really like to tell you in all sincerity my experience. I am sorry if I had sounded a little sarcastic, I did not intend to. It was just a genuine question.

Here is my story, real and sincere, coming from a real life experience. I wrote it to Dr Zakir Naik also but there was no response. The purpose of telling this story is not to propagate any religion as I believe that religion and faith are linked to one's relation with God and He alone is the judge about who beleives in Him and who does not. The real purpose behind my narration is to share something which is spectacular and different and something which shows an intensely humane side of Muslim version of God which is Allah.

I am daughter of a Hafiz of Quran. I am MA in English literature, my mother tongue is Urdu. I am married to a man who was born Hindu but does not practice Hinduism. I refuse to use the word 'convert' because it suggests application of external force, whereas my husband has been more of monotheist even before I married him. But in all honesty, he does not practice any religion, either the religion of his birth or the one to which he himself showed adherence to. I have two sons, Arsh and Kashf.

I grew up outisde India as my fater was on UN assignment, my exposure was more to Christian and Hindu ethics. Art home we were taught Quran and Namaz and were committed to Roza and all the Muslim festivals. My father encouraged questioning, and he always had an answer, he quoted extensively from the Prophets' lives and never rebuked us for any of the impertinence we showed. To me Islam was then, a religion I was born into. I did not think much of it.

We came back to India when I had done my matriculation. We, all five siblings, were growing up and our parents wanted us to be in India amidst our people and in our culture. I got admitted to a primier college and was doing well in studies. In college, I happened to come into contact with Marxists and Communists. I began to question why we need to do namaz with such precision, why was God so strict? I began to question whether there was a God at all, and how does one know whether He was called "Allah" or addressed by some other name, after all in all monotheist faiths all he is called by different names. I questioned why we had needed to fight to spread Islam? Slowly, I began to become an atheist who need proof for everything. I asked why Isa had not married once and Prophet Mohammad needed to marry so many times? All these were my questions. My father watched mty silently give up prayers and Roza and get to a life which was far from God. He said, may you discover the truth one day, like Nooh's son Kan'an did. I asked him whether he was cursing me and he replied, he was not, he was praying for me. I became belligerent towards my parents who were devout Muslims.

This continued, I married. I had my children. My erlationship with my family continued on the side, no one tried to tell me anything. I had declared myself to be an aethist, my husband would chide me for it but I always questioned if there was a God and how do we know for sure wthere His name was Allah? Meanwhile, I had taken to exploring astrology, palmistry and met people who were from different walks of life.

Whenever I was broken in spirit, I would think of Rahman and Rahim, I shied to call him Allah but called him Rahman and Rahim and a voice within would always speak to me with kindness, I put it down to self-speech where a person speaks to himself and answers. I began loving Rahman and Rahim's presence and when people generally warned me about hellfire, I always spoke of Rahman and Rahim and told them this is real God, forgiving, merciful, loving every one,the One who provides even those who do not believe in Him and keeps them alive and gives them happiness. I constructed my own friend Rahman and Rahim and told my little children about a friend who is supposed to be God and if something happens to me or their father, they should turn to Rahman and Rahim. I did it more for fun than because I believed there was a real God sitting somewhere. In fact, my realtionship with God was like that - half believing-half non-believing.

Everything continued this way till I visited a clairvoyant. I did it for fun, and though my husband was totally against it, I dragged him along. That lady, a Hindu, took instant dislike towards me. I told her I was a Muslim and a Syed, meaning from Prophet Mohammad's family, she told me horrible things and said I would be doomed and I should leave everything and take refuge in a jungle. In her room, I heard converstaions, my own voice talking to people I had never met, I did not know and some acquaintances who had been long lost and I had no hope of meeting. Inside the room, there were certain male voices which told me, she is doing evil to you because you are a Muslim, go away from here. I sat there for two hours, my legs would refuse to move. My husband had to physically lift me from the chair, and as we left, I felt very tired and drained as if someone had taken away all energy from my body. Later, I came to know she was a tantrik [sorcerer].

After coming back from her place, I experienced several abnormal things, like one day I was sitting in my house and on the walls, suddenly I saw moving pictures of my sons and husband wearing clothes they did not have. Two months later, my husband bought same set of clothes as I had seen in those moving pictures and I got very scared looking at them. I started hearing voices which told me a lot of geneies have been set on me by that woman and some others. I did not believe them, I became squint eyed suddenly and the doctors could not find any reason. I visited psychiatrists, they said I was suffering from mild deppression but no other disease. I told everyone that I had begun to see aura of people and it was bothering me. No doctor, neurologist, psychiatrist, physician could find anything wrong with me phgysically. The voices continued telling me wrong things which will happen to my family, and they did happen. The conversations I had heard in that room came true, I actually met those people who I had heard speaking with me. When I got too tired, I started visiting places of worship, temples, churches, gurudwaraas and mosques and told the priests about my experiences, they were all very sympathetic and told me God whoever He is does not like people who make use of wrong energies and make others suffer. The Imam of the mosque told me, even if I do not have faith in Allah, he will still pray for me and my family. The voices continued to haunt me but through all the paryers and all, I got some peace and I would sleep at night, otherwise I was given injections to sleep and would still lie awake. My whole family was very upset, I was still squint-eyed and I had started greying suddenly, rapidly. Then there were another set of voices which emerged, they were soothing me and they said Allah is His name who has sent us to you, we are jinns but we cannot break the evil spell on you, ask him for help and tell him to send his angels for help.

One day, absolutely tired and broken in spirit, I decided to give up my life and after many years, I sat down for a nafil namaz. I thought if there was a God, let me offer Him my last respects. I cried and told Him I was giving up my life, everybody thought I was mad and sick. I did not want to die but I did not want to live like that, would He please know that I have seldom prayed to Him but I have loved him and all his creations. Can He send His angels to save my life? And there came a male voice, clear and kind, who do you want to be sent? I asked him if he was God, he said I am his worker.

Interestingly, Allah needs workers! One must wonder what kind of wages Allah pays to his workers. The fact that Allah/God need workers, the angels for example, is well known, of course. But this worker of Allah, whom Shireen chatted with, seems not of the class of angels. How many kinds of workers, allegedly all-powerful but not quite so, Allah placed on his payroll to help Allah out?

I told him I wanted Jibriel, Mikael, Israfiel and Izrael, the four great angels I had heard about. He said, pray for that, I have come from Allah to take your prayers. Then suddenly, I felt something warm enter my heard and my palms became very hot and I drifted to a sleep on the prayer mat.

When I woke up, I heard a voice, proud and deep, "So you had called for us? We are here." I asked him who he was he said I am Jibriel, and I have come down the heaven with Mikael, Israfiel and Izrael, Allah has sent us to ask you what you want, and it should be given to you instantly.

Interesting angels are proud like us, humans.

I asked to be healed and they said go and look, you squint will go, I went to the mirror and before my sight my squinted eyes became normal again. I could not believe! Had it not been happening to me, I would not have belived it.

Interestingly, Muhammad is claimed to have performed many miracles, but nobody saw him doing. His alleged greatest miracle, the splitting of the moon, Muslim thought, could be proven after Neil Amstrong landed on the moon. They started making wild claims that Amstrong indeed saw the split and converted to Islam. All these were proven wrong. Muslim have been master of lies since its birth; Amstrong conversion propaganda is just another accolade they added to that art of theirs. Most of Muhammad's miracles are not provable anymore; moon-splitting miracle was provable, wild claims were made to the effect, but it turned out false. Shireen's miracle was provable. Shireen could have some picture of her squint eye to compare what truly happened to her eyes.

They healed me and Jibriel said, "You must have done something wonderful to impress God, he has counted you among the four ladies Asia, Khadija, Mariam and Fatima, what have you done?" I said, I had done nothing except I belived if there was God He was merciful and He was loving and I have loved all human being regardless of their status." There was a long conversation between me and Jibriel, Mikael, Israfiel and Izrael after that, much of which I do remember but I wonder if it would be of interest to your readers.

It's interesting that Allah has added Shireen to the four so-called best women ever. But she is obviously beyond their class. They never had the luck of chatting neither with Allah's mysterious worker, not his angels. Indeed, Shireen stands above Muhammad, who only had the great luck of communication with one Angel; Shireen chatted with the top four of Allah's angels. Unlukcy for her that Islam does not inform us about the name of other angels. Then Shireen would have been luckier to call down more of them to have a more satisfying gossip.

It's interesting that Allah chooses those people to bless them with such divine accolades, who offerred and would offer very little to humanity. Why Allah does not choose that great like the US woman or Israeli Yihudi woman who just bagged the Nobel Prize in Medicine and Chemistry, whose discovery holds unlimited promise in saving human lives and increase our longevity and wellbing.

I asked several questions by the angels and eventually Jibriel said, "I can see what He saw in you. You will be placed in Al-Firdaus with your forefathers, Allah likes the way you have mentioned Him, that is His true self." I asked him why in Quran there were frequent mentions of hellfire and azab. He said, Allah used to be very strict, principled and slightly angry with those who did not listen but with time, He has changed, He is the benevolent monarch now, you describe Him right, He is what you think He is, now."

Interesting, Allah is just one like us, who can be angry at time (slightly), and of course, he has the same ability to change himself as we humans do, as situations fit.

I asked about Mohammad and Jibriel said, you do not know the society he lived in where people spoke only with their swords and everyone was asked to defend their lives and it was freedom of speech which Mohammad wanted and Allah supported which was not available to Muslims and they had to fight simply to sustain themselves and speak freely.

Interesting! The angels are either ignorant or liars. Muhammad preached Islam for 13 years in Mecca, and even made some 150-200 converts without facing any hostile actions from the Meccans. Not a single Muslim was killed in those 13 years. Not quite the Mecca, Jibriel the liar or ignorant informed our Shireen. Shireen should show some skepticism about this Allah and his contingent---a mafia gang that works through lies, deception, and violence.

At Mecca people of all faith lived peacefully. And now, after Muhammad captured the city, he made it a no-go zone for kafirs, and remained so till today. If a Hindu kafir wanders into Mecca, even by mistake today, his life is forfeit.

Given that Shireen contacted with Allah through so many angels and a worker of Allah, a feat Muhammad was deprived of, how about she goes to Mecca and start preaching a new religion that Allah has changed now; preaching of new doctrine is definitely needed. I hope, Shireen will be able to remain alive for a day. This how Muhammad changed the Arab society---from an extremely tolerant one to one that speaks with sword and blood. Jibriel, it seems, utterly forgetful, if not deceptive, in putting facts in its opposite order.

And Muhammad was fighting for "free speech"? It seems Muslim are going to claim another accolade of their contribution to humanity, the much prized 'free speech', but only in Kafir countries. Let not forget that Muhammad murdered his critics---a few poets and two singing girls---for composing poetry and songs, criticizing his actions and doctrines. Free speech has been strangled in Islamic world ever since.

About Prophet Mohammad's wives in comaprison with Isa Alaihissalam, he said, Isa lived in a different region, in different times, Mohammad lived in Arabia where people used to commit inscests and widows were regarded as everybody's property, you have no knowledge of their times, you merely speculate and compare it with your society. He did not marry them for lust or have them as porcupines, his job was different.

Concerning incest, it's agreeable that society was different then, and their sexual ethics were different too in some respects. Even today different societies, the tribals, exercise sexual ethics somewhat at odds with ours. But given that the Arabs expressed disgust over Muhammad's intention to marry Zanab, his adopted son's wife, which they considered amounted to incest---Muhammad did not turn away from incest compared to Arabian tradition, but pulled Muslims toward it. Muhammad degraded a well-developed sexual ethics of the Arabs, at least, in regard to incest.

As concerns, marrying not for sex, we are told that many of Muhammad's Jihadi comrades had shortage of women. For example, Jihadis complained of having no women for sex after Muhammad's attack and slaughtering the men of Banu Mustaliq and enslaving their women. Muhammad had already Aisha serving him. Still he added Juwairiya, the elegant young beauty to his harem. He already had his harem full of women; he could certainly give Juwairiya to someone else, probably to younger man, who had no women in his share. She could have a more fulfilling life than sleeping with an impotent old man.

And this claim that Muhammad married not for sex, goes even the truth. He was so sex-obsessed that he cheated Hafsa, sending her to her father's house, so that he could sleep with the Egyptian beauty, Maria, his slavegirl. Allah had to intervene when Muhammad's wives protested against the cheating. He the story here: Sex with Slave-girl: How Prophet Muhammad Cheated Wife Hafsa to Sleep with Maria?.

He said Ayesha was herself a grown up girl at that times and asked her father to arrange for marriage with Mohammad.

Now angels have to come to defend against this niggling criticism of Muhamamd's pedophilia. It seems Aisha did not know what was her age, which she clearly says was 6 and she used to play with dolls. The fact that Aisha was six at the time of her engagement with 52-yr-old Muhammad, remained an undisputed story for over thirteen centuries. Now that the kafir world started criticism of it in recent decades, even angels have to call down to change the 13-century-old fact.

He said the religion which Allah wanted to send on earth was monotheism and respect for all His messengers. He said His real name is indeed Allah, but He does not care what He is called.

Allah, it seems, is an Arab. He likes to assume a name, which the Arabs, for ages, used to call their God before Muhammad came. At least, Allah lied, because in the Torah, he calls himself YHWH (Yaweh, Jehova). Or, he keeps changing his name like he changes his mind and attitude.

I asked him about namaz, why Allah wanted everyone to bend before him all the time. Jibriel replied that Allah does not need your cringing and bending, the intention was to include Him in your lives so that He would know that you are happy and you would tell Him if you wanted something, He just wanted to be a part of your lives.

Interesting Allah has a longing of being included in our life; he seems has an agrieved feeling that people made him an outcaste for ages. So he had to pick Muhammad. And Allah has an interesting way of being part of our life, by making us 'cringe and bend' at least five times a day.

Since He is God Almighty, he wanted pure and holy relations with His subjects, He did not want to make himself a husband or a father like there is prevalence in some cultures. I asked Him why could we not address Him as a father, surely that is a pure relation? Jibriel told me, you can address Him anyway you like, but the reason why He did not want to be called a father is because He is the final deliverer of Justice and if He become a relation, how would he impart impartial justice. His justice is, Justice with Mercy and He says to you, He has always been with you, you used to talk to Him.

At least Allah is as weak us, humans. We are endeavoring to create a social ethics so that judges can deliver fair justice to whomever they deal with, even their own children. Allah seems defenitively more prone to falling victim to weakness than humans. If we call him father, then he won't be able to deliver fair justice. Interesting way for Ms. Shireen to discredit other faiths (Christianity)

After that I heard wonderful names of Allah Rahman and Rahim and talked to prophets and they said they were happy to know that people still knew them.

Jibriel sometimes still converses with me in Urdu poetry which is mature and divine.

After Muhammad gone, Jibriel has been out of business. He must have been well-nigh bored for the last 1,400 years. At last, he has some way to beat his boredom, gossiping with Shireen. And, interestingly, Jibriel has remade himself, from acting as transmitter of Allah's message to a gossiper to entertain Shireen. Of course, Allah has to do something for his the best woman, deserving a place even above Muhmmad, he ever created. Divine entertainment by putting Jibriel at Shireen's service is the best way Allah can reward his best female creation.

Till then, as a Muslim, or as an aethist, I had only questioned God and His existence but now I got proof that He was there, He is called Allah and Islam is not a false religion which preaches cringing and bowing and hatred. I slowly began offering namaz, I taught my sons principles of prayers, they are only 10 and 7, but I wanted them to know that Allah Rahman and Rahim exists and Mohammad was not a liar. Jibriel confirmed several incidents which are reported in Islamic history.

I wonder if Ms. Shireen inquired with the angels whether the atrocious verses of the Quran---like "kill the infidels whereever found" (9:5), "smite their necks" (47:4), "Therefore strike off their heads and strike off every fingertip of them" (8:12)---have been disbanded by Allah, given that He has became a more "humane" God now. If not, then cringing and bending five times a day, reciting these horrendous verses as a means of making Allah part of our life, does not make Allah Rahman or Rahim [merciful]. Her praying five-times only reaffirms Allah's continuance as a barbarous monster, not a more civilized Allah Shireen claims Allah has become lately.

I am not defending Islam, merely reporting what happened to me. There are many things which went on during the course of that conversation, like he said, we have heard you do not want Satan killed, is that so, why? And I told him, I did not want Satan to be killed because it is he who misguides the people, and without a lot which is wrong and a lot which is right, our earth would lose its beauty, we need all sorts to make this world.

We sane humans are continually working toward a better society, better life, better governance, better medicine, better ethics. But here is Allah, allegedly Ramhan and Rahim, is engaged in his cruel game by creating a Satan, and that is Allah's purpose of creation. All Muslims should be heading for crime-ridden violent place like Somalia, Darfur, Swat---where there exist the best dual between bad and evil, the way Allah wants the world to be. But strangely Muslims are desperate to head to Australia, Canada, Europe, America, which offered more peaceful and prosperous life.

He said, "You are the first person who has understood the true purpose of His creation." He asked me whether I wanted Islam to be the only religion in the world and I answered I would like all religions, all cultures to prevail because they make our earth the beautiful place it is. He said, your home is Jannat and you will be in my care herafter.

Sure, a great place for Shireen, where she will have a incredible fortune of watching his blessed Muslim brethren engaged in perpetual copulations with numerous black-eyed, big-breasted celestial virgins (Q 52:17, 37:40, 78:31-32, 78: 33-34), with no-one probably looking at her, the not-so-attractive earthly women. Not quite a place civilized humans, male or female, would ever want to be.

Jibriel still speaks to me but now in form of automatic handwriting where my hand moves by itself and writes in the air, I can sense the words. After this, all my ailments were healed and the doctors could not believe that my eyes had rectified by themselves. For me this was a journey back to Islam. I can not convince anyone about the truth of my story but I know that it is not concocted, my eyes are proof of this.

Surely, there is no way that you can prove this cock-and-bull story. In this age of technoloy, you had perfect opportunity to document the miracle you experience, like you becoming squint-eyed, then becoming healed.

If you find it intersting, please publish it, not to convert back people to Islam but only to know that there is a benevolent God who wants us to make Him a part of our lives and He is there for us whether we believe in Him or not.

I promised that I would publish your story if interesting. It's definitely weird, not sure interesting. And despite it has been designed to counter a series of criticisms and charges we make against Islam and Muhammad, I still publsihed it, with my comments included.

I thank you from the depth of my heart for giving me a fair opportunity to express.

With Love and Regards,
Shireen Akhtar

You are welcome and same to you.

Note: Readers should note that Shireen said she had become an atheist, which she never was. Having a few questions about Islam, like about the meaning of praying five times a day, does not turn one into an atheist. Most Muslims, who rarely stick to all its rituals, have such questions, more or less, but there are a very few consciously atheists in Muslim communities, not even one in ten thousand. Becoming an atheist is a far longer journey. Even a majority of those who leave Islam remain a believer, whether spiritually or embracing another faith.